I love my life

I really, really, REALLY do.
I'm never alone...
I have this AWESOME, sweet, funny, adorable boyfriend who craves me as much as I crave him.
And then he has these two totally cool teenagers who are just plain ole GOOD kids and they keep me company whenever he's not around.
I never knew how FRIGGIN great it would be to have a big family.
I know 4 kids isn't that big of a family, but it is double what I'm used to.
And I looove it!
Not only does having more people around contribute to my feeling of not being alone, but so does having a man at my side who is always at my side--whether it be in body or just in conviction.

See?
This is why I don't blog much anymore...
Spewing this kind of joy and contentment is kinda gag-reflex-inducing.
I can't type worth a shit anymore, either.
And maybe he's all the audience I need...
I think I needed blogging before because I was lonely--
which is not to say that's the only reason people blog, but for me it was a big part of it.
I needed adult interaction.
And maybe I will blog again someday, but it will never be the same.
I guess for now, I will continue to seek a new voice, a new style, a new format.
And maybe.............
this lack of need for an "outlet" will give me more time to actually write fiction........
we can only hope.
Heh.

This weather is divine.
Cool, crisp, fall weather!
Warm sunshine, changing leaves.
Today we went for a motorcycle ride.
It was delicious!!
Oh and there was this woman.....
did I dream it?
No...I didn't.
We flashed past her, and for one long moment all was still.
A figure stepped through the bushes, a specter in broad daylight.
She had a smudge of shortish, reddish hair;
her overalls were the color of bone, the shirt underneath a nameless shade of grey.
She paused there, framed by green and it was as though she was me, from ten years ago, wishing to be where I am now.
Oh, god, How I Wished!!!!!!!!!!
With all of my soul I yearned for this love and these trees and this ocean and my parents and
my heart is so full of all of it that I can hardly breathe.
I need to write a love song to my love.
If only I could sing.....